A Trip to the Library

AH WENT TO TEH LIBERRY GUISE.

First off, I went looking like a band nerd, what with my taped up toe, ponytail, shorts tan lines, and music camp T-shirt.

And then I geeked out over classical literature.

List of Books I Checked Out:
- Dante's Inferno (So excited about this one. Like, you don't even know)
- The Iliad (Again, so freaking excited.)
- A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway (This one's for school, but I'm still pretty pumped.)
- Android Karenina by Leo Tolstoy/Ben H. Winters (Just... awesomeness. It's a revamped Anna Karenina.)
- A Little History of the World by E.H. Gombrich (Again, for school.)
- Beowulf (This one has both the Old English and the translation. It's a bit daunting, I'll admit, but I couldn't resist.)
- and a biography of Sam Houston for some stupid essay contest my mother wants me to enter.

And then I checked out a porn novel to piss off my parents. I flipped through it in the car and hot damn. It's got a shirtless man torso on the cover. Is it sad that this is how I rebel? Also, there's vampires, but from what I've seen it's not stupid like Twilight and they incinerate in the sun like they should.

Then, as I was coming out of the library with my gigantic stack of books, I saw a girl dressed similar to me going in with a gigantic stack of books. We gave each other the badass nod. I love fellow nerds.

<3,
Lani

A Day At Work. Or Some Creative Variation Thereof.

It's 5:40 in the morning, what am I doing up? Today, I'm going to work with my dad. Hell if I know why, my mom keeps bugging me to do so.

So yeah, I'm up, it's ungodly early, and shit like so. Be prepared for a running dialogue.

My dad and I are fighting an ongoing battle over my black toenail polish. I relented and took the purple of my fingers because it's "not professional", but he wanted the black gone too. I forgot to take it off and just wore close-toe shoes instead. He gave me the eyeroll/sigh parental thing.

Coffee apparently prevents skin cancer now. Maybe all the coffee I drink will balance out all the time I spend in the sun.

I'm wondering if I should have brought a jacket. My dad didn't, but he keeps his car at around -42°. But I suppose it's a moot point because all my jackets are sweatshirts. Not "professional". But fucking comfy.

There's a building with a big sign that says 'condos'. At first glance it looked like 'condoms'.

I'm kind of killing time until it's late enough to start texting people.

Hey, look, a store with slut clothes. If I ever have a boyfriend who buys me stuff like that, he will be sleeping on the couch for a month.

My dad is taking advantage of my presence to haze all his coworkers. I've already pretended to be Rochelle Osborne, interviewing Dad about his application to the special forces and Teresa Lisbon inquiring about a job because my dad is a total Mentalist fanboy. His boss totally bought it.

Shit You Will Not Find In a Normal Office That My Father Has Laying Around:
- severed ram's head on the wall
- model of a spine that looks disturbingly real
- letter opener that looks like a knife
- sort of table looking thing...? With stuff?
- gavel on a board on a wall
- whatever the hell this thing is

Dad has a meeting, so he stuck me in an unused office and gave me a bible. I guess he forgot he had my phone, and by extension internet.

Two hours. In a room. With nothing but a bible after my phone died. (It wasn't that bad, actually.)

After Dad's meeting was over I did actual stuff that consisted mainly of printing and stapling. The printer was weird and I had to put paper in it five times over a course of around forty five minutes.

It's lunchtime and my dad's outside on his phone. It makes me want to act ten and whine "PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEEE!

There is a strip club right next to my father's office.

I finished printing, stapling, and shuffling papers and now I have nothing to do. Getting up early is catching up with me. I want to go home and fall asleep. Or drink more coffee.

And then the day ends with stuff I don't want to write down because it's boring.

The end. Yay.

<3,
Lani